Bevis and Butthead meet COTC
by carebare 82
Summary: What happens when Bevis and Butthead go to Gatlin on a "retreat."


COTC Fanfic by Carebare 82

Disclaimer: I own nothing being too poor to buy the rights to any of the characters. They are still owned by that unbeliever Mike and that like Steve dude who like scares people and stuff. He's cool

Beavis and Butthead Meet the Children of the Corn

Scene 1: Highland High detention

_Beavis and Butthead are sleeping on their desks while Mr. Buzzcut sits at the teachers' desk reading the football playbook The book is a plain blue spiral notebook that has a title taped to it. The title in typewritten words reads: PLAYING WITH BOYS._

_(In his sleep, Butthead accedently punches Beavis in the face insteantly waking him up.)_

**Beavis: **(_Angry_) Och..ehehe cut it out fart knocker. (_punches Butthead in the face, waking him up_)

**Butthead: **(_Wakes up alert_) What's your problem ass munch?

**Buzzcut:** (_Puts his book down and stands up at his desk_) Beavis and Butthead! What is your major malfunction?

**Butthead: (**_Not, well never, affected by Buzzcut's yelling_) Ughughah my function, my function is in my pants.

**Beavis: **Yeah ehehehe me too.

**Buzzcut: **(_Yelling like a drill sergeant pronouncing every silible in a every spoken word_) You two are the big-gest pi-les or horse puke I have ever met.

**Butthead: **Ahahah you said whore.

**Beavis:** Yeah yeah and poo, whore poo ahahah cool

**Buzzcut: **(_Face as red as a beat_) If I was allowed by Tex-as law I would kill your sorry asses and piss on them right before I pound them into the crap covered ground. This is the tenth time this month you worthless sacks of dog vomit have been in detention. I'm sick as hell of it. (_As Buzzcut is yelling, Principal McVicker walks by the class room. He knows who's yelling and why. He walks through the door_)

**McVicker: **Ahhh what did these little bastards do this time ahhh?

**Butthead:** We like broke stuff ahahahaha

**Beavis: **(_Fustrated_) Like we went to use like the compooter and stuff and like we were trying to look at naked chicks but like there weren't any. Eheheheh none dammit (_shaking from head to toe_)

**Butthead: **He was like really pissed and stuff ahahah he was having a temper tantrum ahahaha

**McVicker: **What the hell are they talking about?

**Buzzcut: **These filthy pervertswanted to see pornography, but the school's internet security system would not let them,(_gets into Bevis' face_) so Beavis throw the monitor at the wall.

**Beavis: **(_excited and fusterated at the same time, not that that's unusual_) Yeah and it blow up eheheheh and there was fire, fire, fire,

**Butthead: **ahahahah It was cool. (_slaps Bevis in the face_) Settle down buttdangle. Ahahah

**McVicker: **Ahhhhh that computer cost this school $1,000 ahhhh you little pricks are going to pay for it.

**Buzzcut:** I suggest that we beat these two with fraternity paddles until their asses bleed profusely.

**Butthead: **ahahaha Like start with Beavis.

**Beavis: **Noooo ouch....eheheheh that's not cool ass monkey.

(_All of a sudden Mr. VanDreason bursts into the door_)

**VanDreason: **(_Upset, dah, probably high too_) I heard what you two were planning to do to punish these boys and that is not the way to treat them. They were only exercising normal male aggression.

**Beavis: **Yeah eheheh I'm always like angry at stuff.

**Butthead: **Our little Beavis has a lot of problems; ahahaha probably because he's such a dumbass.

**Beavis: **(_Slaps Butthead in the face_) Shut up turd burglar.

**Butthead: **That's it, I'm gonna kick your ass.

(_They start fighting. Butthead gets out from his desk and starts punching Beavis in the face constanly. Beavis defends himself by choking Butthead. They roll around the ground. Mr. VanDreason starts talking over the fighting._)

**VanDreason: ** You see what I mean. Anger is only normal in young men. Maybe they need a retreat. (_Beavis and Butthead lay on the classroom floor, catching their breaths_) I was looking in the paper, and I saw an article about children who have their own religion and live out in the country among corn fields. I think that would be perfect for the boys.


End file.
